Friday, September 28, 2007

Goodbye to a Friend

I suck at things like this, I wish I was one of those skilled individuals who knows what to say in a sad situation.

For the longest time I've maintained that internet friends can become as real as offline friends. The bonds that form can be strong and it doesn't matter if the person is in front of you or not.

There are a few people I've found online that I am incredibly fond of. One of them I don't speak with very often but when I do it's always a good experience and I'm better for my contact with this person. Out of respect for his privacy I'll omit his name.

Someone very close to my friend left this world Thursday and it makes me sad. He was a kind human being who, not too long ago, sent me a care package consisting of a pack of smokes (inside joke to do with my quitting), a pack of the most awesome caramels I have ever had, a flower petal, a concert badge and a small string of prayer flags - just like they hang at Everest. This gesture touched me so much when I received it, how a stranger could gift me with something so close to my heart and so very me. I smoked the cigs, ate the caramels and the flags hang over the entrance to my office.

I don't know the particulars, I didn't ask. It's enough to know that he's gone and people I care about are feeling a horrible sense of sadness and loss that they do not deserve. I do know that he was not alone when he passed and those who cared for him shared in a Tibetan Buddhist ceremony and that warms me.

My heart goes out to my two friends who are mourning now. Death sucks enough as it is, it's a million times worse when it's unexpected and/or sudden.

It's inadequate consolation but I want the world to know that a man named John that I had never met managed to touch my heart to its very core with a simple act of kindness and tremendous insight. He may be gone but his gift to me and the spirit behind it will remain with me forever. May you be with the blessing lights and enjoy peace and joy in the bardo and in all your future lives.

Thank you for being a part of my life. You will be missed.

1. Oh man...I am so sorry.

   I understand the pain; I’ve lost several online friends over the last few years, and it doesn’t matter that we never met face to face. All that matters is that connection; I loved those people as much as I’ve loved in-the-flesh friends. When they leave this life, it hurts every bit as much… I still mourn online friends who have been gone for more than 5 years. I miss them, very much. But I am SO thankful we found each other...that’s not easy to do when there’s a million people online at the same time.

   Thumper  on  09/28  at  03:09 PM

2. I’m sorry to hear about your friend.  I know how it hurts.  I think about my lost friends most days.  I know they wouldn’t have me dwell so I carry on.  I’m sure this person had a brighter time having made a friend of you and vice-versa.

   farg  on  09/29  at  02:40 AM

3. thank you.

    on  09/29  at  04:34 AM
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