Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Implosion Explained

That fine line between sanity and the abyss is getting thinner by the day.

I have to be the strong one now, tomorrow is his birthday and no one should be sad on a birthday.

Please. Allow me to give you a breakdown of the past four days of my life.

Friday: A mass is discovered on Bey (his cat) and my AC went in the car. Can't go upstate without AC, Templeton has an unusually high temperature as it is and in the heat he would get sick. We figure the car needs freon and decide to take it in Monday. High stress day.

Saturday: Bey goes to the vet. The vet doesn't like the feel of the 'solid masses' (there are 4) and does a needle biopsy. Three hundred dollars. Ok, not a problem. Pay it. The spectre of cancer is looming hard over this house then.

Sunday: Trying to keep the spirits of the birthday boy elevated I add a few more presents, last minute things. Hey, that's what credit cards are for, right? No one should be sad on their birthday, no one. It's hard not to let the mind obsess on the bad.

Monday: Mechanic calls to tell me the compressor is dead. It's going to be $535 for a compressor and labour. Holy crap. Money isn't really an issue at this point. The cat needed to be taken care of and the car needed to be done but that's a lot of money in a week and it only adds to the existing stress.

Tuesday/Today: Mechanic calls to tell me the fan is also dead. Total? $795. Excuse me? That's what some people pay for rent, are you serious? Then the call from the vet comes. It's cancer, it's serious - get him in ASAP for the surgery. Ugly words were mentioned like feline lymphoma and breast cancer. Drop him off tomorrow and do the surgery Thursday.

Tomorrow. You know. Darkstar's birthday. Are we happy yet?

And did I mention my freakin' ovaries kicked in today?

So it's been a pretty dark couple of days, I apologise if I'm snappy or less than fun to be around. I'm not dealing well and I probably won't until Bey comes home post surgery and all that crap is gone from him.

Man, when it rains it pours.

Thank you to the people who have expressed their support, I don't say thanks often enough but without the support and caring of you guys I'd be a complete emotional cripple by now.

Happy birthday, Darkstar.

1. take care of yourselves.  thinking good thoughts for you.

   malfouka  on  06/28  at  01:54 AM

2. Cancer in your little fluffs is so hard to deal with. It does get easier, slightly. Just remember to spend as much quality time with Bey as possible. He’ll remember that always.

   I hope you have a better tomorrow. I’ll keep Bey and you in my prayers.

   Binary Blonde  on  06/28  at  02:23 AM

3. Your in my thoughts, WK, Bey and DS. That’s all I can say.
   *hugs*

   Seraphim  on  06/28  at  04:33 AM

4. Oh Lord, you guys do NOT deserve all of what’s been thrown at you lately. :( I am so sorry to hear all of this, you’re all in my thoughts and I will be hoping and wishing and sending all the good vibes I can your way that everything goes well on Thursday. *hug* Hopefully you guys can get through DS’s birthday and then, once Bey is home, celebrate it properly.

   Kel  on  06/28  at  07:28 AM

5. hope things go well at the vet.  It’s hard to lose a pet.  I just had to have mine put down a couple months ago.

    on  06/28  at  08:41 AM

6. Hang in there.

   Bey’s a tough cat.

   Mango  on  06/28  at  10:08 AM

7. I’m so sorry.It’s been a really crappy week.Here’s hoping for a jolly July!

   katkat  on  06/28  at  02:52 PM

8. I’m so so sorry...I always wish that I knew the right things to say at times like this
   but I don’t. *hug* Love to you, and I’ll be thinking of you.

   aka_monty  on  06/28  at  05:11 PM

9. Oh my sweet, I know how you are feeling. I just lost the second of two dogs in the last six months to cancer. And the monetary costs are as bad as the emotional ones.

   Monty sent me over to give you some love today. ((hugs))

   Megan  on  06/28  at  05:53 PM

10. Coming from Monty’s to say feel better soon and yes, that is precisely what credit cards are for.

    hug.

    Raehan  on  06/28  at  05:57 PM

11. Monty sent me over big Hugsssssssssssss.
    ML has hit you hard.
    I hope for a speedy recovery and a cancer free Bey.
    The car repair costs sound exorbitant.
    Plastic can come in handy. Try and hang in there.
    My thoughts and prayers are with you.

    Happy Birthday Darkstar!

    Raggedy  on  06/28  at  07:16 PM

12. Monty sent me over to give you hugs too.  I’ve only “known” her for a few months, but she’s kept me
    laughing and smiling when I was down.  I wish you the same.  I guest-posted on her blog, if you’d like
    to go check it out. 

    Anyway, things will get better from here on.  Keep smiling.

     on  06/28  at  08:04 PM

13. Hi Webkittyn, Found you via Raggedy. 
    Beautiful blog you have here. 
    Sorry to hear your kitty is not well.  It’s difficult when our
    pets are ill.
    I went through something similar almost 2 years ago, when my
    16 year old boy-cat was unwell, and it turned out to be lymphatic
    cancer.  It was the hardest decision I have ever had to make,
    but I know I made the right one.
    I miss him dearly, and it took me almost a year to get a new
    cat ... who is not a replacement, just another member in our
    family.  Ratbag will never be forgotten. 
    My thoughts are with you.
    Take care, Meow

    Meow  on  06/29  at  05:27 AM

14. Monty sent me.  Hugs.  And don’t implode.  I know that feeling all too well.  Blow up all over someone.

    Jules  on  06/29  at  08:55 AM

15. Shitty week indeed.

    For what its worth, I send you cyber hugs and happy wishes.

    YummY!  on  06/29  at  10:06 PM
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