WebKittyn Warbles
Monday, December 10, 2007
Letter to Northern Dutchess Hospital
Hello,
I'm not trying to get anyone in trouble here but I truly believe this needs to be addressed. I cannot for the life of me understand why this happened the way it did.
My father, Charles Ives, was admitted to your ICU two weeks ago tomorrow. He's in bad shape, the future is questionable. He is on a ventilator and it's fairly grim.
The care he has received the from the nurses in ICU has been wonderful. A few of them have gone above and beyond to make both my father and my mother's ordeals as easy as possible.
The next step for my father is a tracheostomy for his breathing. We are all aware that the prospects are grim but they haven't even done the trach yet.
Your hospital assigned a 'care worker' to my mother. I spoke to her once, I believe her name is Michelle but I cannot say for sure. My understanding was this 'case worker' was there to answer my mother's questions about possible outcomes or anything else she needed.
Keep in mind, they have not even DONE the trach yet.
This woman met with my mother today. Instead of offering her any sort of help, she spoke only of possibly having to move him to a long term 'home' and how difficult it is to find one. She made it seem as though your hospital was going to stick a trach in his neck and rush him out of the hospital, like it was time to give up on Chuck.
I find this repugnant. Yes it's bad but he's not dead yet and the trach hasn't even gone in! Where does this woman feel that going on only about possible worst case scenarios and drive-thru surgery is going to help my mother in any way?
It's horrific enough that his happened right before Christmas but for this woman to do nothing but bash hopes is truly cruel. We're not fools here, we understand how serious this is but what happened to hope? Why make it sound like NDH won't do anything for him after the trach goes in?
How is this 'case working?'
I had to listen to my mother relay all of this on the phone, in tears. I have no words to explain my heartbreak and outrage that this was allowed to happen.
Again, his medical care to date had been exemplary and the nurses in ICU are all wonderful but this woman was way out of line this afternoon and trust me, she did nothing but damage. How cruel to rob a 66 year old woman of the hope that her husband of 47 years might just live.
I think someone like this needs some serious humanity training.
Sincerely,
Heather L Ives
Daughter of Charles Ives, ICU Patient of NDH.
-
Tsk, tsk at Michelle.
I certainly do empathise with you because I’ve been there. My mother was dying a few years ago and one of the doctors was nothing but bad news. “She probably has dementia” after “She’ll probably die” and worst came out of their mouth. My mother came very very close to dying but she pulled through.
Unfortunately, this is not an uncommon reaction among people in the medical profession; they are used to dealing with seriously ill and disabled people as “problems” with no life if they require constant care.
Do know there ARE options out there and he does NOT have to go into a nursing home. There are independent living centres in New York and all of them will gladly provide help to your family. There is a chance with the trach your father will improve and they will give you options other than a nursing home. That’s what they are there for. Perhaps it will require a personal attendant who is an RN part or all of the day but they will help you.
I am with you, it is repugnant and you’re right, he’s not dead yet. Just keep thinking that and remember that rollercoasters do have up times and eventually do come to an end.
Hlyn, stay strong and don’t be afraid to ask for help. There is hope, just remember that there is.
Here is a List of Independent Living Centers. Hope this helps.
Bobby on 12/11 at 03:51 AM -
Send this Michelle to me and I’ll give her a big boot up the tushy.
I have worked in British hospitals - in wards, emergency, physiotherapy and outpatients and I am happy to say I’ve not come across someone like that yet. Thank goodness for that.
Best wishes, as always.
Seraphim on 12/11 at 05:38 AM -
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