WebKittyn Warbles
Saturday, March 19, 2005
On Birthdays
I have one thing in common with Anton LaVey, the total celebration of the birthday. It's not just a day, it truly is a commemoration and a personal power day. A personal new year to allow for a chance to make up those botched resolutions and wipe the slate clean once more.
That aside, birthdays were always a huge event in my house. Being a spoiled only child, my birthday was second only to Christmas in celebrations.
When I was small my mother would rent the pool for the day from the YMCA (it was a gorgeous place). She would have food catered for after in the private dining room and always a huge cake and well stuffed goodie bags for the kiddies. God, how I loved those parties and looked forward to them every year. We'd invite the whole class and the entire shindig would usually run about 7-8 hours. I got my first piece of jewelry in 3rd grade (a small silver ring) from Steven Caligor, leaving a very sad Allen Benello (third grade love triangles, I tell ya..)..
After the party there would always be the family gathering back at the house; the parents, my grandmother and 2 great aunts. We'd open presents alllllll day, eat cake and be merry.
I had the sort of birthdays I wish for all children and not so much for the presents but for the love. Impossible not to feel like a loved and happy child when life is like this.
As I got older my grandfather took over the birthday celebrating. I could take as many of my friends as I wanted to whatever restaurant I chose, no limits. We did Tavern on the Green, The Russian Tea Room, Mama Leone's, Windows on the World, (the name of the famous German place escapes me) and my personal all time favourite - Trader Vic's. Trader Vic's was in the Plaza Hotel and it was a Polynesian place with huge tikis and all sorts of atmosphere. This was where I chose to go more than once, I loved that place.
Starting at 15 we added something to the birthday hoohah, the Hippie Place. I don't think the place had a name, I'm pretty sure it was just the Hippie Place. It was on City Island and it was this tiny little ice cream place. The place was owned and run by leftover hippies who lived out back on a boat. The entire place had things hanging from the ceiling, if you were tall you were screwed.
The catch was the Deep Throat. This was a MASSIVE sundae with 8 or so scoops of ice cream, every sort of topping, bananas and strawberries, gobs of whipped cream, nuts and cherries. BUT...
Picture this.. This was how my mother got it, she had no clue what she had gotten herself into the first time. You're sitting in this bizarre place and you've just ordered a sundae called the Deep Throat, sort of lowering your voice when asking for it so people around you don't hear and titter. All of a sudden you hear banging, the sound of utensils banging on pots and pans. What could this be?
Suddenly from the kitchen emerge 5 hippies; one with a candle, one banging on a pot, one with a tambourine, one banging on a pan and one carrying the sundae. As they start to move towards your table they are all chanting "DEEP THROAT DEEP THROAT DEEP THROAT" and continue, getting louder, until they all stand behind the person who ordered and clap and "DEEP THROAT" some more..
I'm about to pee on the chair I'm laughing so hard remembering it now. People used to come from all over to experience this and I can't tell you how many hundreds of unsuspecting souls were embarrassed by this, I know I brought many Deep Throat virgins down there.
I'd like to wish everyone I care for a happy birthday for my birthday and I'd like to wish every child out there the sort of birthdays I always knew.
Now it's time to eat CAKE.
<-- Steal me!
