Sunday, August 03, 2008

Silly Silly Kittyn

First I have to say that Ocean Spray Raspberry Cranergy is the shizzle. It really does give you a boost, I wasn't expecting anything. Nice taste. I didn't like the pink one (I forget the flavour) but the green is good stuff. I can't drink soda in the Summer. I hate warm soda and it gets warm so damn fast. I've been living on ruby red grapefruit juice, iced tea, lemonade and Cranergy.

I was thinking today. I was talking to a blogger person I occasionally chat with and the focus of the conversation was how important it is to this person to have a popular blog. To have blog read by strangers, be high up on all the ratings lists and have a gazillion readers in one of those tacky feed burner boxes that show reader numbers.

It reminded me of me a bit, how I was two years ago. Yes I still want to be a playful primate in the Ecosystem and I freely admit to that but that's pretty much it these days. I won't go sign up for blogrolls just to get more links, if I'm on it it's because I support it. But I remember how excited I was when I won the BoB, I think some of it went to my head for a while. Look at me, people read my blog so I must be important.

I look around and I see all these listing places and ranking places and now it's letter ranking with images. I don't get it anymore.

Maybe it's part of what changed in me with the almost dying and the continuing horror that is dialysis but it just seems so silly. Not to say you can't meet amazing people from blogging and make connections that last a lifetime, of course you can. Some of the people I consider to be my real world closest friends are people I've never laid eyes on, it's all in the mix on on and offline.

I guess I just don't crave or care about the attention anymore. I have a few people I know of who read this, people I know on and offline. I appreciate that they take the time out of their day to come here and read it. I appreciate the people who end up here by accident or through google and stick around a while. I appreciate all the links and linkbacks and lord knows I cherish the comments.

But I don't seek attention. If I look at the site meter and only 3 people have been here today that's okay with me. What does it get you, what does it add to you as a human being on this planet to have a popular blog? Why was it once so important to me?

I've been tweaking this place a bit, consolidating the blogrolls and getting rid of some of the crap. Slow process but happening. Unlisting myself from a few places, it's just silly. I've never liked cliques, even back to my childhood a thousand years ago I would go against the cliques and seek out the outcasts. What was I doing looking to be part of this big internet clique of 'it' bloggers?

So maybe this place has been more boring since I came home from the hospital. Not as many entries, most of them pimping my sucky show. I've chosen not to opine on politics yet, politics draws people. It's been more for me lately than for show and I'm sorry if I'm no fun anymore.

I've always been a spotlight person. Now I'm content to sit in the darkness and enjoy others and their spotlights.

Spotlight, anyone?

1. While I would love to be internet famous I’ve always blogged mostly for myself.  I like blogs that are the same.  Personal blogs make me come back more often than others.

   Its probably too hot under the spotlight anyway.

   YummY!  on  08/04  at  11:03 AM

2. I’d take that spotlight if I could fit it in my caboose. I just plain like attention. As for my writing on my own page, I am indifferent to people showing their faces there to read it. Most of the time I send people there because I’ve posted pictures of a project I completed or something equally schmaltzy. I like a lot of attention, but when it comes to my writing, I tempt fate just by disclosing my personal thoughts in a public forum.

   I capiche.

   Mare Martell Stotler  on  08/05  at  07:14 PM
Page 1 of 1 pages

Name:

Email:

Location:

URL:

Smileys

Remember my personal information

Notify me of follow-up comments?