Friday, June 17, 2011

Talking in Code

I like to talk in music or rather, through music. Not all the time and not for everything but anything or anyone that matters in my world has some sort of music associated with them/it. Most of the time I don't tell people when I match them with songs, it's mostly for me. Letting people know the songs they've been given is personal, it's like giving a piece of myself away. Maybe that will change with my conversion to a human being with human emotions but who knows. For now my world of songs is my own.

More than half the songs I stick up there in the 30 Day Song Challenge or just post are not random picks. They all mean something to me, they're all associated with someone or something.

Sometimes when I'm too much of a chickenshit to say the things I want to say I'll do it with a song. It's usually pretty clear to the intended target that this one's for them. I do the same when I'm pissed, I've just been doing it forever.

Yes, it would be easier just to say the things to the people or write/talk about the situations but who wants easy, I've never taken the easy route with anything and I've never liked anything easy (except British men). I know it also pisses a few people off, I've gotten bitched at more than once for responding to questions/spats with music instead of words. Not forever, I eventually do talk but this is an annoying habit of mine I actually enjoy so I take the bitching. I like matching songs to people and things, I like getting lost in a song that reminds me of a person. I love it when someone catches on that that one was for them without my telling them, that thrills me. The haters are going to have to keep on hating.

To me, if a song is just a song then I have no use for it. There are millions of songs. It has to mean something. Like sex, it has to have emotion in it, it has GOT to mean something.

Even Darkstar doesn't know all the songs matched to him, some are sarcastic and he wouldn't appreciate the humour.

So there's my little secret for the night. I talk in music when I'm either too much of a coward to speak up or just because I enjoy it. Something on FB will go by and it will remind me of a person or a song matched to the person whose post I just read on goes the song. I can't post them all, my wall would be all songs and no boots.

I guess I do that with a lot of shit, not just music. Yes, this revelation just in. Talk about free flow writing. I know I talk in circles a lot of the time but the people who are supposed to get it, get it. The coward thing isn't entirely true either. Yah, sometimes it's there, who wants to be told to piss off or told their song sucks but for the most part it's just my screwy head. I like talking in circles and in music.

I come clean when asked though, I'm not that freaky. If called out directly I'll spill all but if left to my own devices I'll speak through music and things that might not look like they make sense to the rest of the world except myself the person or people meant to get it.

No, I don't expect anyone to sit there and waste time trying to figure out if the latest bit of tripe on my wall is some deep message or what the hell the latest song means. I don't expect anyone to care that much, I really don't. I'm just trying to explain why at times I appear so peculiar. I'm not an easy person to get to know. Getting easier but the annoying code talking isn't going anywhere.

I'm really not that batshit, I pretty much know what I'm doing (how was that, did it sound like I meant it?)

I just go about things in odd ways.

I prefer the word 'quirky.'

And yes, this a totally dopey pointless entry no one's going to give a fat rat's ass about but that's okay too. A lot of the FBers aren't bloggers so they don't quite get what I'm doing here but they read when the posts pop up on the wall. It's self-therapy. I slip into the quiet hours of night with some good mood music on and this is when and were it all comes together and starts to make sense. This is why we blog.

Tonight was a good night, I'm feeling dopey and silly and at the same time deeply reflective. It's been a full night of songs that have meaning to me, that's where this all came from. Last night was so sad I'm totally content with right now. Right now is right how it should be and I'll take that.

So hello, my name is Heather and now that you've agreed to be my friend you'll have to get used to me talking in code. It gets easier.

1. I’d give my belly button fuzz to know what song you associate with me. Keep in mind, without any hair on my belly, it takes a LONG time for anything substantial to build up, so it is indeed rare.

   Mare Martell Stotler  on  06/17  at  02:30 PM

2. What a nice post. I like this great post. I found many helpful things from this post. Thanks.

   online marketing firm  on  03/24  at  09:30 AM
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