WebKittyn Warbles
Friday, July 29, 2005
Why People Like Me Do Not Have Children
Danielle, I don't know how you did it..
I love Templeton. He's really become an amazingly sweet and loving kitten. He's very clingy with me, as soon as I sit down on the mattress STILL in the middle of the living room floor, he's right there purring and nuzzling. Can't get enough of that good lovin'.
But oy, are kittens work! I had no idea what I was getting myself into and next time I think I'll go for a year old or so.
Wednesday night I was sitting in there on the bed, watching Greta and keeping an eye ont the two of them. Claude doesn't seem to understand he's 20 times the size of Templeton and he pounces hard when he plays.
(continues inside. Warning - graphic details of feline anal issues) At some point Templeton went into his box, which is also out in the living room (Home and Garden decor we are NOT). He gets in and squats and starts mewling like a fiend. Loud, heart-tearing mewls. I jump up and grab him the second he comes out. Lift up the tail and take a look at the butt.
What the bloody Hell is that?!?!?
There's a black knob about the size of a cherry and it's sticking out of his ASS. No wonder he can't crap, this clump of dried poo is blocking his bong hole. Lovely.
I grab a paper towel and figure it'll just come off but nothing is ever easy in life. He starts howling and hissing and trying to bite me and the poo-knob won't budge. Ok, get up and try a wet paper towel. No such luck, this stuff is lodged in there good.
He gets back in the box and tries again, more mewling and crying but no poo in the box. I pick him up again and take a look, his arse is covered in poo that squeezed out past the knob.
(yes, this IS disgusting but you were warned)
I realise at this point this is not a one person job. I'm nervous squeezing him, he's so damn tiny. So instead I end up staying up pretty much all night listening to him mewl and crying because I'm a loser. heh.
Same thing yesterday, no poo and lots of mewls and no way I can get that thing out. Time to enlist the Gotard, this is not meant for one loser alone. Meanwhile he's trying to get his love and tracking little poo stains all over. He got up off my leg and there was a nice poo splotch on my pants. Ew.
Gotard came home and we got down to it. Put some warm water in a tub and dunked his bottom half as he hissed and yowled and tried to eat Gotard. I'll give Gotard credit here, I was freaking but he was pretty calm.
After about an hour of his prodding and pulling and getting splashed with poo-water, the knob of dried poo FINALLY came out and we were able to cut away what wasn't blocking his bung hole.
I guess we did the right thing, he was super affectionate towards me after it was over and he recovered from the
horror (Templeton, not the Gotard) and he did crap normal last night.
But dayam, no one told me to expect stuff like THIS! heh.
Made me think back to a time in my life when in a fit of stupidity as a very young child I ate string. Said string would not come all the way out and I remember my mother had to come and pull it out of my arse. I wonder if I ever thanked her for that.
Unreal.
Didn't get much sleep last night either, too busy watching him to make sure we didn't rupture anything but he was fine. Playing and running and tormenting Claude, it was over for him but I sat there all night twitching.
All in all, an experience I did not need in my life portfolio and one I hope I never have to endure again.. You mean to tell me human mothers have to deal with stuff like this with human babies??
No thank you. Nuh uh.
I really need uninterrupted sleep.
-
Glad he’s well.
You did the right thing.
It’s kinda gross, but this stuff happens. You just have to think those happy thoughts and put up with it while it lasts. And it could have been much, much worse (you don’t ever want to see a prolapse if this was gross).
Try sleep through tonight. Blogathon starts early. No overtaxing yourself like the other week.
on 07/29 at 01:59 PM -
Oh my fucking God that was hysterical.. I am so glad that is over for you.. Girl sometimes I dont know how I do it either.. I have 2 kids and 2 cats. But you get used to it eventually.. My oldest is 13 now she can basically fend for herself and would be mortified if I even went near her butt. She wont even let me come in the bathroom when she is taking a shower.. Kudos to you on the bung hole thing, you did a great job mommy..
D~
on 07/30 at 08:39 PM -
Life portfolio. *giggles*
Ginger on 08/04 at 04:39 AM -
Hiya Woman,
Oh my God I can definately relate to this post. I did a crazy thing and went and got me a kitten. She was abandoned in an old freezer and won my heart the second I saw her. She is 3 months old and is completely adorable but omg is she bad. I had a poo issue with her yesterday and I thought I was going to be sick. She is a orange medium haired tabby and cannot seem to manage to keep the poo off of her little butt.. It is so gross.. My kids are hysterical cause I am constantly chasin her around with a paper towel to clean the poo hangin off her ass. My 2 other cats are in an uproar. She is very prissy and walks around like she is queen of the roost.. Which of course does not make my Alpha female happy at all. Minnew is hissing and spitting and even went so far as to bite me the other day. Of course Minnew is the picture of perfection once David comes home, but any other time she is just not happy at all. Pumpkin ( don’t ask I didnt name her) couldn’t care less. She struts around my house like Nermal the worlds cutest kitten. It is truly comical. Blast my mother for making me a cat lover. When will it end.. Hope all is well in your world. I miss you all terribly. I cannot wait to just come home.. OHIO SUCKS....
Danielle
on 11/02 at 11:54 AM
<-- Steal me!
